Which Fairy tale is your favorite Fairy tale?

Ice

*eyeroll*
Fairy tales have been with us for a long time. Some guy who is dead now once said that Fairy tales are depersonalized dreams that have been dragged out from the deep, dark, ethereal recesses of our minds and put into the daylight of reality for all to see and enjoy.

I am always looking for new, weird Fairy tales to read. So I ask you, dear posters, what are you favorite Fairy tales?

Here's my favorite (for today, anyways.) Recorded by Pu Songling, it's from Ming Dynasty China. (synopsis below if you can't understand)

"Sha Huizi was a master of the powerful form of kung-fu known as Steel Shirt. He could hack through the neck of an ox with the flat of his hand. He could put his hand directly into the animal's belly.

Once, he was at Qiu Pengsan's House. A large block of wood was suspended in midair, and he ordered two strapping great fellows to hoist it up and let it fall. He took the full impact, but the block merely smacked loudly against his belly and bounced away across the room. Then he took out his penis, laid it on a stone and began hammering away at it with a wooden mallet, without causing himself the least injury. But he refused to try using a knife."

Synopsis:

There was this guy who was hella sick at kung fu
and he was at some rich dude's house showing off
so he had some other dudes hit him with these giant blocks of wood
and he was fine
and then he was like "yo dogs check this out"
so he busted out his cock and started smashing it with a mallet
and his cock was fine
but then someone was like, "wow, try that with this here knife"
and the kung-fu master was like "nah"

Hoped you enjoyed reading as much as I did.
 

DangerousPuhson

Should be playing D&D instead
I'm a fan of the original versions of Disney classic tales, where Cinderella's ugly step-sisters get their eyes torn out by pigeons, or where The Little Mermaid constantly felt like she was walking on knives and her feet bled with every step. Shit's morbid, yo.
 

Ice

*eyeroll*
I'm a fan of the original versions of Disney classic tales, where Cinderella's ugly step-sisters get their eyes torn out by pigeons, or where The Little Mermaid constantly felt like she was walking on knives and her feet bled with every step. Shit's morbid, yo.
Cinderella occurs all over the world. I believe that there is a Zulu version of Cinderella where the slipper is grass instead of glass. Which version of Cinderella is it where their eyes get torn out my pigeons? Seems like the Grimms brothers to me but I can't rememer.

Yeah the Little mermaid is a crazy one! Disney sterilized the hell out of it. All of Hans Christian Anderson's stories are pretty whacked out. I once heard someone describe him as a psychological terrorist. Have you read the Shadow by him? It was my favorite when I was reading through his story collection years ago.


I really enjoy Smith of Wootton Major.

I also once wrote an outline of a fairytale set in Eberron which I was quite pleased with.
Thanks, I haven't heard of the Smith of Wootton Major before! I've been reading lots of short stories lately so I am excited to check that one out. Tolken was one of my childhood favorites so this is extra great.

Also, your troll fable made me laugh when I read it. It's a good outline All fairy tales and fables have a moral unconciously buried in them somewhere. What do you think the moral of yours is? Also, is it public domain? May I complete it?
 

Beoric

8, 8, I forget what is for
Also, your troll fable made me laugh when I read it. It's a good outline All fairy tales and fables have a moral unconciously buried in them somewhere. What do you think the moral of yours is? Also, is it public domain? May I complete it?
If there is a moral I didn't put it there consciously.

I don't mind what you do with it, but Eberron and the Daughters of Sora Kell are owned by WotC. Sora Teraza is dusk hag and blind seer. Sora Maenya is an annis with a reputation for random slaughter, who is believed to bind the souls of her victims to their skulls, which she dangles from her belt. Sora Katra is a scheming and highly charismatic green hag, generally shape-shifted into the semblance of a beautiful woman., and whose curses are legendary.
 

Chainsaw

A FreshHell to Contend With
Hansel and Gretel, easy.

Also, the Rankin/Bass Christmas special.
 
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Two orcs

Officially better than you, according to PoN
There is one about a boy in a porridge eating contest with a giant. The boy puts a leather bag under his shirt and puts his bites into it. When the giant asks him how he can eat so much despite being so small the boy says "like this!" and cuts the bag with his knife, spilling the porridge on the ground. The giant is impressed and disembowels himself.
 

bryce0lynch

i fucking hate writing ...
Staff member
12 in 1 blow! ... and anything with a soldier returning home. Those always seem to be fun.

The Turnip Princess is a book of collection of lesser known fairy tales, with the original cruelty intact.
 
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squeen

8, 8, I forget what is for
I like that weird Chinese one about the three brothers...how did it do again? One swallowing the ocean...or something.
 

gandalf_scion

*eyeroll*
That’s “Three Brothers.”

They all look alike. One cannot drown, one cannot burn, and one cannot break. One day, the brother who cannot drown drinks the sea so that his friend can go fetch treasure from the sea floor. But the treasure-seeking boy strays too far and ignores calls to return. Full of water, the one-who-cannot-drown is about to burst when he releases the water and thereby accidentally drowns the treasure seeker.

The magistrate then sentences the one-who-cannot-drown to death by hanging for drowning the treasure seeker. Of course, the brother who cannot break actually appears for the execution and the crowd stares in awe as he asks to be cut down after swinging from the gallows.

Annoyed, the magistrate sentences the subject to death by fire. Of course, the unburnable brother appears for that execution. The crowd stares in awe as he emerges from the white hot oven asking for a coat to keep him warm.

And so the magistrate relents and let’s the accused go free.
 

Ice

*eyeroll*
12 in 1 blow! ... and anything with a soldier returning home. Those always seem to be fun.

The Turnip Princess is a book of collection of lesser known fairy tales, with the original cruelty intact.
Santa brought me that book for Christmas. It's pretty great. The first few stories were underwhelming, but the deeper into it you get, the more interesting they become.

I can't remember which story it was, but in one of them, the protagonist finds a ruined, abandoned castle and then goes down a well next to the castle to find an inverted castle inhabited by an asshole Dwarf. That would make for some great DnD.

Someone else got me this for pagan yule time, and it is also very good. The illustrations are wonderful and many of the stories feature Baba-Yaga and her dancing hut.
 
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